Many sadomasochistic submissives like to have to do or undergo things they don't like, that's the deep pleasure of BDSM. Humiliation and role-playing often also revolve around the submissive's resistance and emotions. But for sadomasochists, the consent and well-being of both partners remains important.
It's good when the submissive person cries and screams that you have to stay away from them and they don't want to go any further, as long as they tell you how cool it was afterwards, smiling and they want to come and hug you and thank you. However, if it turns out that after a BDSM session she is still angry and she goes to the police angry, then you have done something wrong?
But how do you know if your submissive is saying "no! stop please stop no please I can't do this" (which basically means, go on I love it) or "no stop, stay away from me no please I beg you please I can't do this" (which means: I can't do this, you're going too far, you're crazy)?
Often you can read this in body language. Especially if you know your partner, you can recognize the good from the bad crying. From the way your submissive reacts, you can deduce a lot. But dominators are not supermen. They cannot read minds, they are not perfect at interpreting body language, they make mistakes.
BDSM (safeword) stop words are a fairly simple and effective means of communication. A safeword is actually exactly what the word says: a word that you use to indicate that you want to stop. Because "no", "stop" and "stop" in SM language are often synonymous with "yes, keep going", they are not good stop words, that's why SMs often choose other words.
The most commonly used stop word is probably "red". When the submissive or Dominator says "red", it means that the MS session must be stopped. Some people also use the word "orange" to indicate that they need to slow down because they are almost at their maximum. However, keep in mind that you will use the stop word mainly in emotional and violent situations, so keep it simple and use "Banana" for example.
In many situations, it is better to simply indicate with words that something is wrong than to use a safeword. In bondage, for example, it is much more pleasant for the dominator to hear that a certain string is too taut because it can be adjusted. If you think you are going to faint, it is also much more relevant than saying the word "red". But many people still find it useful to agree on a stop word, because there are situations in which you want to convey information in 2 seconds.
Some people find it very nice to have a stop word, for them it is very meaningful. It can even be a whole ceremony when the submissive gives his stop word, it can be experienced as a sign of trust. There is nothing wrong with that. In the end, communication within a BDSM relationship is mandatory if both partners want to have fun.
It's good when the submissive person cries and screams that you have to stay away from them and they don't want to go any further, as long as they tell you how cool it was afterwards, smiling and they want to come and hug you and thank you. However, if it turns out that after a BDSM session she is still angry and she goes to the police angry, then you have done something wrong?
But how do you know if your submissive is saying "no! stop please stop no please I can't do this" (which basically means, go on I love it) or "no stop, stay away from me no please I beg you please I can't do this" (which means: I can't do this, you're going too far, you're crazy)?
Often you can read this in body language. Especially if you know your partner, you can recognize the good from the bad crying. From the way your submissive reacts, you can deduce a lot. But dominators are not supermen. They cannot read minds, they are not perfect at interpreting body language, they make mistakes.
BDSM (safeword) stop words are a fairly simple and effective means of communication. A safeword is actually exactly what the word says: a word that you use to indicate that you want to stop. Because "no", "stop" and "stop" in SM language are often synonymous with "yes, keep going", they are not good stop words, that's why SMs often choose other words.
The most commonly used stop word is probably "red". When the submissive or Dominator says "red", it means that the MS session must be stopped. Some people also use the word "orange" to indicate that they need to slow down because they are almost at their maximum. However, keep in mind that you will use the stop word mainly in emotional and violent situations, so keep it simple and use "Banana" for example.
In many situations, it is better to simply indicate with words that something is wrong than to use a safeword. In bondage, for example, it is much more pleasant for the dominator to hear that a certain string is too taut because it can be adjusted. If you think you are going to faint, it is also much more relevant than saying the word "red". But many people still find it useful to agree on a stop word, because there are situations in which you want to convey information in 2 seconds.
Some people find it very nice to have a stop word, for them it is very meaningful. It can even be a whole ceremony when the submissive gives his stop word, it can be experienced as a sign of trust. There is nothing wrong with that. In the end, communication within a BDSM relationship is mandatory if both partners want to have fun.
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